In this tale of resilience, Bernice faced escalating tensions in her relationship. Prioritizing her safety and well-being, she made the difficult but necessary decision to leave. Here’s a glimpse into her journey and the supportive community that stood by her.
A Blended Relationship Jamaica, Italy and Saudi
Bernice was a 22-year-old woman with roots in Jamaica and Italy. She had been in a relationship with her boyfriend, who was 32 and from Saudi Arabia, for two years.
They had many differences, but they also had a lot in common. One of the things that was different between them was how they viewed marriage.
Bernice felt she was still too young to think about getting married. She wanted to spend more time with her boyfriend before making such a big decision.
She told him she would need at least two more years before thinking about saying ‘yes’ to marriage. But her boyfriend didn’t see it that way.
They Decided To Take a Trip to Greece for a Holiday
Because of his cultural background, he believed that if two people loved each other, they shouldn’t wait too long to get married.
So, when they decided to take a trip to Greece for a holiday, Bernice was just thinking about enjoying the beautiful country and spending quality time with her boyfriend.
But he had a different plan.
Three days into their trip, he got down on one knee in a gorgeous spot and asked her to marry him! He had planned every little detail to make it perfect. But Bernice was taken by surprise.
She Said “No” to His Proposal
She felt a mix of emotions. She was shocked because she wasn’t expecting it and nervous about how he would react when she said ‘no.’ To deal with her shock, she laughed.
This confused her boyfriend because sometimes Bernice laughed when she was happy, sad, or even angry.
When she said ‘no’ to his proposal, he first thought she was joking. But when she kept saying ‘no,’ he understood she was serious.
He stood up and asked her why she didn’t want to marry him.
He Started Speaking in Arabic
As she tried to explain, he got very upset. He started speaking in Arabic, his first language, which Bernice didn’t understand. This made her feel even more uncomfortable.
When she asked him to speak English, he seemed even angrier. He told her she was ungrateful after all the effort he put into planning the proposal.
He was so upset that he decided they should go back home early! Bernice wanted to stay and see more of Greece, but she knew it would be very awkward after everything that had happened.
Things didn’t get better When they returned to their home, where they both lived. Her boyfriend was still furious. Whenever Bernice tried to talk to him, he just said, “Don’t.”
She Knew She Wasn’t Ready for Marriage
This whole situation made Bernice feel very confused and sad. She started wondering if she had made a mistake by saying ‘no.’ But deep down, she knew she wasn’t ready for marriage.
Even though she had these thoughts, she wasn’t sure if she would act on them. However, things were quickly going to take a chilling turn.
The next day Bernice, still reeling from their turbulent trip to Greece, tried discussing their issues with her boyfriend.
Instead of understanding, he aggressively grabbed her throat and accused her of cheating!
So She Decided To Leave Him
He told her, “There’s no leaving, understand? I’m angry, but you’re not allowed to leave.” This was a horrendous shift in their relationship dynamics and raised immediate alarms.
Bernice wasn’t sure where to go, so she turned to Reddit for advice. They quickly suggested she leave, with one user saying, “Men who choke their partners, even just once, are significantly more likely to kill them. I scrolled down pretty far and didn’t see anyone mention this. It’s the biggest red flag to exist. Please get out.”
So Bernice decided to leave him.
She was grateful for the advice and support offered by Redditors and the courage they gave her to embark on a new, safer chapter in her life.
Have you ever faced a situation where you had to prioritize your well-being over a relationship?
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / H_Ko. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.