A young woman took to Reddit for opinions after she fought with a guy friend over his wife. It seemed they disagreed about just why she ditched him. Here is the whole story.
Her Friend’s Wife Left Him
OP is a 32-year-old lesbian with a 29-year-old girlfriend. They have been friends with a straight, married couple for a few years.
About a year ago, the husband lost his job, and OP watched from the sidelines as he struggled to find something new.
Finally, after several months of looking, the husband found a new gig. From what OP could tell, it paid less than the old job, but at least it was something.
In between, though, the man’s wife left him. He’s been trying to pick up the pieces ever since, and OP and her girlfriend are in the circle of friends supporting him.
Letting Off Some Steam
Recently, OP and her girlfriend went out with her husband and some of their other friends.
While they were drinking and letting off some steam, the man started to complain about his wife. Not everything he said rang true with OP, though.
The big thing OP took issue with was when her friend said that his wife left him because he was unemployed.
OP knows that’s not really the case, though, because she heard them arguing about their situation plenty of times before they ever split up.
The major issue was that OP’s friend had two kids, ages two and four.
While the man was looking for full-time jobs only, his wife wanted him to find something that would let him work from home.
She Knew What Really Went On
That way, she told OP, he could watch the kids, and they could cut out the expense of daycare.
But OP’s guy friend never even tried to find something that let him stay home.
And, what was worse was that he never helped out at home, anyway. OP had heard his wife complain many times about how she lived like a teenager.
The wife had also told OP she wanted to get rid of their cleaning service and have her husband do more chores. But he shot that down.
So OP wasn’t going to let him lie about his wife when she wasn’t there to defend herself.
OP told the man that his wife didn’t leave because he couldn’t find work. She left because he wouldn’t do anything to help at home.
Loss of Respect and Friendship
The husband didn’t want to hear any reasonable arguments, though, and told OP that his wife lost respect for him because he wasn’t bringing any money in.
OP and the man continued to argue until her girlfriend and the rest of their group stepped in to break things up.
Later on, OP’s girlfriend told her she had been way out of line for getting involved in something she knew nothing about.
Some of their friends think the husband was right. They say women always leave men who stop providing, and that OP wouldn’t understand because she’s a lesbian.
Keep Your Nose Out
Others think OP was right about the facts, but they say she should have kept her nose out of it. Plus, it ruined their night out.
Now, OP is questioning whether she should have tried to stick up for the wife or just kept her mouth shut.
Many Redditors were flabbergasted by the sexist attitude of the husband and some of OP’s friends. They can’t believe they think women regularly leave men when they lose jobs.
Others think OP was probably right; many of them agree with her girlfriend that she should have minded her own business.
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