A struggling mother’s Reddit post went viral recently when she asked if she’d made a mistake forcing her daughter to remove the do not disturb function from her phone.
Deeply Concerned
This mom is concerned about her teenage daughter’s use of the “Do Not Disturb” feature on her phone. Initially, her 16-year-old daughter would still answer calls and texts while using the feature.
However, for the past few weeks, she has not responded to her mother’s messages or calls at all. When questioned about it, her daughter claimed she hadn’t received any messages, but her mom knew better than that!
Mum, Do Not Disturb Me!
She knows that her daughter has the do not disturb feature on and that her texts and calls are going through, but her daughter is choosing to ignore them!
The original poster (OP) has tried to reach her daughter through her other children, but none of them are able to get a response either. The eldest daughter has tried calling, texting, and even Face Timing to no avail.
Having a 16-year-old is a worry when you don’t know when they will come home.
Missing in Action
Over the weekend, the OP’s daughter attended an event at school and needed her mom to pick her up. But when the OP arrived, her daughter had gone missing in action and, once again, wasn’t answering any of her texts or calls.
The OP knows this is because the do not disturb feature was on, and as she sat there waiting for her child to come to the car, she grew increasingly frustrated – after all, it was her daughter that asked her mom to pick her up!
When her daughter finally entered the car, the OP told her that she needed to start answering calls and texts and had no reason to ignore calls, especially when she knew she had a lift waiting.
Infuriated Mom
Her daughter said she hadn’t seen the calls, but this infuriated her mom! Her frustration turned to anger, and she started yelling at her daughter.
She shouted, “none of us are able to easily get ahold of you! Something that normally takes two minutes takes twenty or more since we can’t seem to get you to answer the phone! Your father and I have been worried sick whenever you don’t answer the phone!”
Rolling Her Teenage Eyes
Like all teenagers, her daughter rolled her eyes at her mom. Then the OP gave her an ultimatum: either remove the do not disturb feature from her phone, or the phone gets taken away for a week.
Her daughter complained, saying it’s not fair for her mom to dictate what features she has on her phone, but her mom explained that she needs to start answering or, at the very least, call back right away. The OP told her daughter that if she didn’t comply, she’d take her phone away, but her daughter didn’t like this!
She started begging her mom not to take her phone away, but when the OP asked her again to remove the do not disturb feature, she refused!
The Phone Wars
When they got home, the OP told her daughter that if she didn’t want her phone taken away, she needed to remove the do not disturb feature right there. After some back and forth, her daughter removed it right in front of the OP and then ran to her room in tears.
The OP had allowed her daughter to keep her phone on do not disturb as long as she would answer phone calls and texts, but her daughter was utterly unreachable.
She couldn’t do this simple task, so the feature got removed. The OP thinks she was too harsh, but she’s a mother at her wit’s end, so she had to try something drastic.
Drastic Measures
The OP explains that she wouldn’t be too worried about her daughter if she hadn’t been lying to them. She’s been lying to her parents about where she goes and what she gets up to.
Sometimes her daughter would ask to borrow the car to get food but would come home two hours later (ignoring any of her mom’s attempts at contact in the meantime).
None of Your Business
This troubled mother has tried taking the car keys away, but her daughter has borrowed her sister’s car in these instances. When her sister would ask where she was going, she’d say it was none of her business.
Usually, if her daughter goes to class or gym practice, she’ll tell her parents, but outside of those times, she’s incredibly sneaky about where she’s going and what she’s doing. Her mom says, “it’s like she’s hiding,” and that her worry is purely from a safety aspect.
She would be fine giving her daughter more freedom if her daughter would just communicate with her and answer her phone calls, but her daughter seems intent on never doing this.
Broken Trust
The OP and her husband can’t trust their daughter anymore; hence their frustration with her phone’s do not disturb feature.
Redditors agreed with this mother’s ultimatum and how she reacted.
One user said, “a teenager has the phone to be contacted. If she can’t use it for its intended function, she doesn’t need it. The Do Not Disturb function can be set up such that priority contacts go right through it. She is choosing not to.”
What do you think about this story? Should she let her daughter have more control over her phone, even though she’s been lying to them?
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Source: Reddit